Loosely Methodist here.
2. What is your opinion of Merry Christmas vs. Happy Holidays?
It depends. Usually I will say Merry Christmas, but I’m also okay with Happy Holidays.
3. How do you feel about holiday music on the radio?
I love holiday music and Christmas music on the radio! My favorite is Adeste Fidelis – I learned it in Latin years ago, and I think it’s beautiful when sung that way. We had to learn a bunch of other ones too, some of them rather humorous, like Jingle Bells (Tinnitus, tinnitus, semper tinnitus, which translates into “ding-a-ling, ding-a-ling, always ding-a-ling”). I also have a fondness for Bob Rivers, who has such parody classics as “I Am Santa Claus”, “Holidaze”, and “Toy Sack”.
4. When do you start decorating? Do you?
We start the Saturday after Thanksgiving. That’s when the tree, decorations, and possible outdoor lights go up. Some years we’re more extravagant than others, but it does suck when the Christmas lights go on and blow the house fuses…
5. White lights or multi-colored?
It depends. On the tree, I ilke colored lights, and sometimes I do all one color. Outdoors, we’ve done all white (icicle lights, deer, etc), and also all blue, which I think looks peaceful in the snow.
6. Gift cards, cash, or actually shopped for presents?
I think presents are pretty cool – I like giving presents over gift cards or cash because then you aren’t coming out and saying, e.g., “I’m spending $15 on you”. It can be a lot of fun finding particular gifts, and I usually buy them year round if they strike me. I like getting presents as well – especially when there’s some thought behind the gift.
7. Christmas cards and/or family update letters?
I typically just send Christmas cards – sometimes with a little note about how things are going. I’ve never been one to write out a letter for Christmas.
8. Fill in the blank: Snow is ______ .
Pretty at times. We have so much snow that there are times I hate it, but if I don’t have to go anywhere, I think it’s pretty when it falls and blankets everything.
9. Have you been a good little boy or girl this year?
I’ve been pretty good – as good as I could be.
10. Favorite: old/traditional holiday movie? Contemporary (after 1975) holiday movie?
This one’s a tough one. Pre 1975, I’d say Babes in Toyland, and Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. Post 1975, Christmas Vacation, Die Hard, and The Nightmare Before Christmas. I just can’t narrow it down any farther.
Bonuses – Christmas sex:
What have you done under the mistletoe?
A better question is what haven’t I done under the mistletoe – and there’s very little I haven’t done.
Have you caught mommy/daddy kissing Santa Claus? What happened next?
No, I never did.
Have you had sex in Santa suit?
Ha – I will actually say yes. My Santa suit is very short – barely cover-my-ass short – and is red velvet and white trim, with a red velvet g-string. Complete with Santa hat, black belt, knee-high black stiletto boots, and a glass candycane dildo, I think I’m a pretty sexy Santa to have sex with.
Have you had sex with Santa?
Indeed I have. After enticing him with my sexy Santa outfit (and some cookies and beer), I’ve had great Christmas sex with Santa before he drops his…er, presents off.
Just how merry have you made Santa’s helpers?
Well, I haven’t made them nearly as merry as I’ve made Santa, but I think they’ve been happy when they’ve left.
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