Save A Cowboy, Ride A Hoss!

I have been looking for a big toy. That is, my husband has been looking for a really big toy for me. After browsing dildos on EdenFantasys, we decided to try the Hoss by Tantus, and even though I’d read the measurements I was stunned at how truly massive this dildo is. There’s something about reading and actually seeing in the flesh for me.

My first thought when I took Hoss out of the shipping box was “Holy cow, what have I gotten myself into?” Hoss is enormous. Humongous. Gigantic. Bigger than big. He makes Randy look like a beginner’s toy (and Randy most definitely is not).

This dildo is the size of my forearm! It’s 12 1/4″ long from tip to base, with an insertable length of 10 1/2″. It has a circumference of 8 1/2″, which is a 2 3/4″ diameter. This is the circumference of a Coke can (while I need to get another prop, this should give you an idea of just how big Hoss is).

Conceptually, the difference between 2 1/8” diameter (my previous largest toy) and 2 3/4″ diameter is not that much (only 5/8” of an inch). In reality this is an enormous difference on a toy, and a difference in circumference of almost 2”.

Hoss is also heavy. It weighs in over 2 pounds. This is as heavy as or heavier than almost every toy I own!

Hoss is made of black silicone and is a soft matte color. It has a bit of surface drag when you run your finger over it. It’s slightly squishy, and has a bit of flex, although it’s still quite firm. Hoss has a well-defined head and some textured veining down the sides. You can feel the veins somewhat on the shaft when Hoss is inserted, although they are fairly subtle. The base has balls and is flat on the bottom so Hoss can stand upright on a flat surface. It’s firm enough to stand upright without flopping or tipping over.

Since Hoss is silicone, it’s non-porous, hypo-allergenic, latex free, and phthalates free. It can be cleaned with antibacterial soap and warm water, or run through the dishwasher on the top rack. It can also be boiled, if you’ve got a huge pan to do it in. Hoss should be stored standing up away from other toys. Only water-based lubricant is safe to use.

I do like Hoss, but it takes some getting used to. This has to be the first time ever I’ve needed to use warm-up toys to work up to using a dildo. Hoss is way too big for me to use without preparation. I never expected Randy to be a starter toy! Once warmed up, it’s still difficult to insert, even when using lots of lube. The head manages to catch if it goes in too fast, which is not at all comfortable.

Hoss works better in certain positions. I can’t use it doggie-style as the head seems to catch more, but it’s easier to handle when I lay on my back or squat over it. I’ve found on initial insertion to go very slowly, and take it in a little at a time. This is one toy I don’t let my husband touch, as it’s not a thrusting, ramming toy for me. It’s more of a slow stretcher.

I particularly like to have Hoss standing on the floor or on the table. That way I can control the entry and speed. Once I get used to it, I find slow thrusting and grinding are not as much of a problem. Going slowly does allow me to orgasm, when I pair Hoss with some clitoral stimulation.

If you’re looking for something truly massive, Hoss may be for you. But be warned, this dildo really is bigger than it looks in pictures.

I purchased Hoss from EdenFantasys, and you can too by clicking here.